I’m glad someone finally mentioned this because I can bring about my expertise to the difficult challenge of economic migration! Which of course I am a double doctorate PHD.
When we consider economic migration (or EM as I shall refer to it when I get bored of typing that repeatedly) we have to ask ourselves a set of questions to help expand our understanding of the complex nuances. What is EM? What Causes EM? And how does EM affect us? These are just a few of the vast number of things we must consider when we simply ask Economic migration? Eh?
What is Economic migration? It’s when financial systems and the support they offer to the societies they inhabit move on to more lucrative subjects in neighbouring regions to feed off. The actual migration might be so small scale that a large enough subject, such as a country or city wouldn’t even notice, but smaller towns would soon wither away to be weak enough to be attacked by raiders, probably from former towns that too were once part of the Economic being’s life cycle.
What Causes Economic migration? Well that is up for debate, some believe that economic migration is caused by some sort of hive mind that belongs to the bank families, causing that bank colony to push their hive (or building society) into a river to float away into a more sustainable location, others believe that banks are comprised of individuals that all work on some sort of nomadic lifestyle, taking their vaults and tills into their traditional range rovers and set off as one tribe. I personally subscribe to the latter theory because it makes more sense, and because the former theory suggests that banking staff are not humans at all and that there must be a banking staff queen, giving birth to thousands of accountants a month.
No, that horrible image to dark to contemplate, and so economic migration is caused by the nomadic lifestyle that is traditional within banking families. Of course when I mention banking families, your natural assumption is to think I’m talking of the BIG banking families, such as the Rothschild’s, but banking staff are all banking families, it is not a career but a lifestyle choice of the tribe.
Banking being the nature it is, it soon causes a land to become toxic with debt and sub-prime mortgage lions start to invade the area, taking away young accounts playing with their first abacus.
So when an area becomes dangerous to the banking families, they pitch up their banks and move on to settle in an area full of rich fertile yuppies to be milked.
What does economic migration do to us?
That really depends on the area you live in. Areas that are becoming wild with Mortgage lions are soon to lose their banks due to economic migration, but this is a positive because the mortgage lions and other diseases that follow the banking families (such as in-the-red fever) soon leave the area, leaving the indigenous populace to reclaim the land, after months or even years, the land is fertile again and will once again become attractive to the nomadic banks that will once again find the area and settle down for the short period of time.
If your area is already filled with banks then everything will seem normal to the indigenous populace, and quite soon they become to wonder how they got on without banks, with being able to access their money supplies through the bank magic of chypeenpin, everyday life becomes easier. This ease of life is good at first and continues to promote economic growth but soon the indigenous populace becomes too lazy to work but still want money, so the nomadic banks offer their help, but then they want more money than they lent you, and this is due to their second and darker form of black bank magic called eyuntar ‘n’ rest and soon enough you have mortgage lions moving in.
The initial period of Economic migration is a joyous one, causing almost utopian levels of bliss in the areas they inhabit, but it soon becomes apparent that his symbiosis of banks and culture is actually a parasitic relationship. This is not the banks fault, it is their culture and their way of life and we should not begrudge them because it is all they know.
Unless it’s true that banks are actually a hive species, lead by evil queens pumping out larvae accounts designed to suck upon our very life force, in which case I would suggest burning down every bank hive you see! And just to be safe, use the flame thrower on any one in a suit too.
Ok I honestly don’t know anything about economic migration. You caught me, well done! But seriously, who does? I even Googled it and there was no Wikipedia! If Wikipedia doesn't know, then it doesn't exist!
Ok that’s all for today! Anyone else fancy picking a topic for the next time I feel like doing this? Please place all suggestions for the next topic into the comments box below. And also places all comments onto the comments box below.
Sunday 30 August 2009
My first go at Suggest-A-Topic-O-matic! (EVERYTHING needs an O-matic): Cloning! Cloning! Cloning! Cloning! Clon.. Ok I’ll stop
Well here we go! I had this idea (Read, stolen blatantly from Charlie Brooker) to have ideas for topics randomly sent to me by people. Unfortunately I don't have masses of fans, followers or stalkers. Just you lot! Now I'm not any authority on anything, and most of what I say will usually be whatever is amusing to me. Of course there may be a few philosophical considerations and maybe some controversy but anyway, let's give this a go
Al quietly whispered into my ear "CLONING!!!" so that's a good as place as any to start!
Cloning (its official now, it’s underlined)
Ok... umh... Cloning? It’s just like photocopying for people right? That we haven’t got quite right and all the ink comes out smudged, except what’s smudged is your genes and your face comes out all melty. The first animal cloned was a sheep called dolly, which seems a bit redundant really. Sheep look alike already; surely they could have just grabbed the most similar looking sheep and plonked it next to the original dolly.
The real controversy with cloning is the horrible human cloning and its juicy bloody ethical issues. If I have a clone, is it me? Or is it a different person who looks like me? Can you clone a soul? These are all pertinent issues if it weren’t for the fact that TWINS ALREADY EXIST.
Nature makes clones already, they have different personalities due to their upbringing, just because one twin stabs a guy in the eye with a pie (sorry, was on rhyming binge) doesn’t mean that the other twin is instantly compelled too. I think the main complaint about cloning isn’t really from the ethics at all; it’s from Science-Fiction. People assume it will be like photocopying (like some retard said above) when in reality a clone would mature at the same rate a normally born human would and their personality would be develop due to all the social lessons and pressures that we grow up with, not including the social stigma that would involve being a clone (if you were one), plus I can’t really see clones being bullied without having their older model back them up or hundreds of their likenesses on their side.
Would clones be made in batches and used for cheap labour? Another sci-fi staple, you have thousands look-a-likes under the command of some dullard, but in reality, the uneducated masses do just as good as job and pay for themselves. If mass-production of people became a reality then I could see it happening, but... why? Why bother spending all that money when nature has given of plenty of idiots to do the job already.
Could you use clones for replacement bits like in “The Island”? Course you fucking could! And this would also remove the need for AA for any other chemical addiction groups because, well fuck it, get 8 new livers designed for your own body lined up and you could paint the town red in your own cloned blood. In fact why even bother transplanting new organs into an old body? Take your old brain out and attach it to your new 20 year old body and start hell raising again. In the Island the premise was that intelligent humans were being used as meat sacks for living organs to be harvested. But if we have the technology to clone perfect humans, accelerate the growth without repercussion, why can’t we just have the bits, or the new body ready without the ethically painful “life” thing in the way?
Can you clone the Soul? Bit of a religious question this one really, that matters on your perspective but I’ve already touched on this so why not? I don’t plan on getting into any massive religious debate on this one because that way leads to madness, slippers and standing on street corners yelling at pigeons about your big shoe.
Assuming I’m me looking at one person and their clone, I wouldn’t be able to see the soul, assuming it exists, so I’d have to guess of personality and other social traits to tell if it was my friend of the clone of my friend. It’s the nature vs. nurture debate and I very much side on the side of nurture, your past experiences and upbringing shapes you, not your genetic code. It’s possible some traits could be pasted down, like too much arse-scratching, but that would be due to a genetic fault with an itchy anus rather than an actual personality trait.
Whoo! That’s about all I can think of for now, I depending on my mood I may or may not come back to this. Sorry if this isn’t as funny as you may have expected and a bit more rambly, but that was the point of this exercise and I intend to continue with it!
Anyone got another idea for the next topic?
Al quietly whispered into my ear "CLONING!!!" so that's a good as place as any to start!
Cloning (its official now, it’s underlined)
Ok... umh... Cloning? It’s just like photocopying for people right? That we haven’t got quite right and all the ink comes out smudged, except what’s smudged is your genes and your face comes out all melty. The first animal cloned was a sheep called dolly, which seems a bit redundant really. Sheep look alike already; surely they could have just grabbed the most similar looking sheep and plonked it next to the original dolly.
The real controversy with cloning is the horrible human cloning and its juicy bloody ethical issues. If I have a clone, is it me? Or is it a different person who looks like me? Can you clone a soul? These are all pertinent issues if it weren’t for the fact that TWINS ALREADY EXIST.
Nature makes clones already, they have different personalities due to their upbringing, just because one twin stabs a guy in the eye with a pie (sorry, was on rhyming binge) doesn’t mean that the other twin is instantly compelled too. I think the main complaint about cloning isn’t really from the ethics at all; it’s from Science-Fiction. People assume it will be like photocopying (like some retard said above) when in reality a clone would mature at the same rate a normally born human would and their personality would be develop due to all the social lessons and pressures that we grow up with, not including the social stigma that would involve being a clone (if you were one), plus I can’t really see clones being bullied without having their older model back them up or hundreds of their likenesses on their side.
Would clones be made in batches and used for cheap labour? Another sci-fi staple, you have thousands look-a-likes under the command of some dullard, but in reality, the uneducated masses do just as good as job and pay for themselves. If mass-production of people became a reality then I could see it happening, but... why? Why bother spending all that money when nature has given of plenty of idiots to do the job already.
Could you use clones for replacement bits like in “The Island”? Course you fucking could! And this would also remove the need for AA for any other chemical addiction groups because, well fuck it, get 8 new livers designed for your own body lined up and you could paint the town red in your own cloned blood. In fact why even bother transplanting new organs into an old body? Take your old brain out and attach it to your new 20 year old body and start hell raising again. In the Island the premise was that intelligent humans were being used as meat sacks for living organs to be harvested. But if we have the technology to clone perfect humans, accelerate the growth without repercussion, why can’t we just have the bits, or the new body ready without the ethically painful “life” thing in the way?
Can you clone the Soul? Bit of a religious question this one really, that matters on your perspective but I’ve already touched on this so why not? I don’t plan on getting into any massive religious debate on this one because that way leads to madness, slippers and standing on street corners yelling at pigeons about your big shoe.
Assuming I’m me looking at one person and their clone, I wouldn’t be able to see the soul, assuming it exists, so I’d have to guess of personality and other social traits to tell if it was my friend of the clone of my friend. It’s the nature vs. nurture debate and I very much side on the side of nurture, your past experiences and upbringing shapes you, not your genetic code. It’s possible some traits could be pasted down, like too much arse-scratching, but that would be due to a genetic fault with an itchy anus rather than an actual personality trait.
Whoo! That’s about all I can think of for now, I depending on my mood I may or may not come back to this. Sorry if this isn’t as funny as you may have expected and a bit more rambly, but that was the point of this exercise and I intend to continue with it!
Anyone got another idea for the next topic?
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