Top government officials are worried that a migrant caravan from impoverished nations may soon push the communist infrastructure to breaking point as a Wigan to Pyongyang train line has been established. Wiganites are expected to line the entire train, even the roofs, as they desperately seek better economic prospects. Leaving Wigan station with only a pie barm and a can of Vimto, they will set across to London where they will not be allowed to leave the train.
Once into mainland Europe they go to Paris, in which the train will be secluded from the outside world in fear that if the Wiganites see any art it will cause a dramatic frenzy in the northerners, first confusing, then enraging them as they try to find any purpose in something that is purely aesthetic
DPRK officials are concerned that the Wiganites won't be able to culturally integrate “How can these people think they'll be able to live here? We all have jobs, whether we want them or not.” stated Zhu Jishen “That kind of culture shock can kill someone, we only kill people on purpose”
“I had a fruit last year, don't they think that kind of nutritional difference will hurt them?” Zhu went on to say “They just haven't thought this through”
Terry Shawcross who has purchased a ticket on the Wigan to Pyongyang train said he was hopeful to find a better life in the DPRK “It's just whippets as far as the eye can see around here, there's no future. I used to sell second hand heroin needles but no one can afford that anymore”
Critics of this migrant caravan on a train say that while it is to follow the Trans-Siberian, the migrants should be accepted into other countries before they reach the DPRK. “Other countries should shoulder the burden, they are passing through seven different countries! Mongolia should at least take a train car worth of them”
Officials in Mongolia simply stated that they were full up
North Korean charity organisation, Really Red Cross, are more optimistic for the north western migrants. “We should care for people in worse circumstances than we are, just because they weren't as lucky to born in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea doesn't mean they shouldn't strive for more. We plan on training the Wiganites to write fake news for our Russian friends”
Whether this will mean new life for people leaving Wigan or even further disaster for the DPRK who are still recovering from Kim Il-Sung meeting President Trump, only time will tell.
